You call me out upon the waters
The great unknown where feet may fail
And there I find You in the mystery
In oceans deep
My faith will stand
Lately, I’ve been struggling with trying to grow closer to God, to focus on my relationship with Christ and not just with Jake. I’ve been so busy that my focus was drawn to the mundane tasks of just getting by, and not thinking about others. I had lost the joy that Christ had given to me in all of the blessings that I had received.
And I will call upon Your name
And keep my eyes above the waves
When oceans rise
My soul will rest in Your embrace
For I am Yours and You are mine
I call out to Him, and I ask for his guidance to know what to do when it comes to my relationship with my siblings, my relationship with Jake and our future together, for my parents’ failing marriage, and for guidance with my career in the future so that the Lord can use me for His glory.
Your grace abounds in deepest waters
Your sovereign hand
Will be my guide
Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me
You’ve never failed and You won’t start now
And then, I realize that the song wasn’t really talking about real, salt water oceans. The oceans are metaphoric and stand for the ministry field to which God is calling those who seek to follow Him.
My ocean, is really more like Lake Michigan. It may seem big to me, but it’s not an ocean. They say all pipes lead to the ocean, and there is a way to travel from Lake Michigan to the Atlantic Ocean. The way is long and difficult, but its rewards come in the greater possibilities once you reach the ocean.
Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior
My current ocean, is my job with the Pregnancy Resource Center here in Grand Rapids, Michigan. I was given this opportunity through God’s handiwork. As I mentioned before, God stuck Jake in my way to make sure that I was paying attention to Him. Jake’s involvement with the ministry of Willing to Wait, a sexual risk avoidance program and student led drama team, led me to getting involved. This ministry is a part of the education and prevention side of the Pregnancy Resource Center (PRC).
The head of the education department was at the drama team practice one night while I was talking about how I had just gotten my schedule for the next semester and I had left room to look for a job. She overheard and offered me the opportunity to do a work-study with the PRC. (It’s basically a paid internship)
That was back in December. Now here I am at the end of March, looking again to the future and I can see how God has put me here to learn something.
I am learning to deepen my relationship by trusting that God has everything in control. I may be walking into this ocean of the unknown, but he already knows how things will play out.
He keeps me from drowning in the stress of trying to avoid complacency and the chaos of schoolwork. He gives me his indescribable peace when I ask for it.
And when things get even crazier and I don’t know what’s going to happen, I sit back and give Him my worries. I pray for peace and wisdom to know his plan. I rest in his embrace because He is my father and I know I am loved.
I may mess up and get scared of going deeper because I fail to keep my gaze on Him. Yet his grace grips me tighter and draws me back to the surface.
My faith is growing daily because I call out to the Lord in my weakness, and in my times of strength. I need him always and he will never fail me. I am learning to trust him as he takes me to new and exciting places. I learned all this from the awesome people I get to meet and work with daily, from the students that I get to practice with on the drama team, and from the people investing in my life.
Oh, Jesus, you’re my God!
My next ocean, is the one I get to traverse with Jake. I look forward to it, not with dread and fear, but with anticipation and a nervous excitement. Yes, I am a little scared right now, but that’s because of some deeper issues that will get addressed later. How do I keep from stressing about it now? By trusting that God will lead us to that ocean when he knows we are ready and he will be our guide as we sail upon those waters.
The application here, is to take a moment and think about what your oceans are. Are you in one right now, or are you crossing a lake that leads to a canal and eventually the ocean? Is there something that God is calling you to that takes your faith and strengthens it because you have to rely on Him for guidance? How is He calling you, and into what deeper waters is he asking you to follow? Are you willing to let God be your boat? Will he guide you through this ocean, or will you only let him be the life-preserver when you can’t do it on your own?