Sin. We all do it. Some try to control it, while others grade it to make it seem like there’s some sin that God will let slide.
Well let’s take a look at my life. Sex, alcohol, drugs. All things I put before God. Sex is something I had constantly to get rid of emotional ties, the more sex I had the faster my emotions would tend to fade. Alcohol was something I used to numb the pain, pain that would return as soon as my buzz went away. Pain that wouldn’t go away, so I drank and I drank and I drank. Knowing that the pain was there to stay. Drugs, yea my way to escape reality, I couldn’t handle the stress of this world so I needed things to change my perception. Knowing drugs are what killed my brother, drugs killed my friends, but drugs stopped this hurt.
Why did I need God when I had all this? I had girls wrapped around my finger, drugs and alcohol where only a phone call away. See those things kill. I was dead. Not physically but spiritually.
God wasn’t on my mind. My next booty call was. I threw God away, so at that moment I was dead spiritually, but just as good as being found dead on the side of the street.
I thought I was living a great life, I was accomplishing things, I was going to college, I was working, and had a great group of friends, or so I thought. It wasn’t until I started feeling empty, I became super skeptical and started questioning the existence of a higher power.
I have never felt depression before. I felt hopeless, lost, and afraid. I was missing everything that was promised by Jesus. Jesus said that he can satisfy all thirst and he is the one who will truly satisfy, he himself told that to the women at the well in John chapter 4. I was looking for purpose, I was looking for security and I was looking for love. Little did I know that I was just trying to be accepted, I was doing whatever I could to find love and purpose. I was doing whatever I could to get it, I even hurt people trying to find it.
Jesus came for me, he found me and at that moment he gave me those things. He provides security, he loves us, and he gives us a purpose. He is our driving force. We can do anything through him because he gives us strength (security).
He came to this world to look for us and then died for us, knowing that a lot of us would not love him back (love).
He had a plan for our life because he has a plan through our lives (purpose).
Jesus died, buried and rose for bad people like me and bad people like you.
My name is Joshi Covarrubias. I’m a 22 year old, taller than the average Mexican male. I’m studying pastoral ministry at Grace Bible College. I was born in the small town of Santa Rita in Jalisco. I was brought up in a very religious Catholic family. It wasn’t till November of 2014 that I gave my life to Christ. I’m now trying to serve him to my best ability. I’m here to kick butt and chew bubble gum in Jesus name of course. P.s I’m kind of a soccer and hip-hop fanatic. I also don’t drink coffee or wear flipflops.